Safe housing and temporary accommodation can be a huge barrier as to why victims find it difficult to leave. Careful planning is important because abusers can become more violent and controlling and their actions can continue to pose a danger after you have left too. Remember: ending the relationship will not necessarily end the abuse.
If you’re a victim / survivor of domestic abuse who has already left, you might be struggling to find stable, safe housing. Perhaps you’ve cut off all contact with your former partner, yet you’re uncomfortable with the fact that they might know where you live. Or maybe you’re staying with a friend, but you know that this isn’t a permanent living arrangement, and you’ll have to find another place to live eventually.
Should you need guidance throughout this process, especially if you’re trying to navigate moving with your children, the Herts Domestic Abuse Helpline have access to a number of housing and accommodation services across county that they could support and signpost you to, Furthermore, the points below may be beneficial to think about to ensure maximum safety for the future.
Seek a Restraining Order
If your ex-partner is still able to contact you, harass, or trying to see you without any legal repercussions, it might be worth exploring a restraining order. You’ll feel safer at your new address knowing that you can take legal action against your ex-partner if necessary. HDAH can guide you to organisations that can help you to explore your options, an occupation order or a non-molestation order could be a starting point.
Recover from Financial Abuse
Many domestic abuse victim /survivors have also been subjected to financial abuse. Of course, it’s harder to secure housing if your ex-partner had sole access to your accounts, or if they tried to prevent you from working and restricted your income.
To come back from financial abuse, Money Helper recommends gathering your identification documents to open new accounts and changing your passwords or PIN numbers as soon as possible. Keep in mind that you may also need to contact your bank or credit card providers to keep your accounts secure, or get in touch with your landlord or mortgage lender to change the payment terms to extricate yourself from the arrangement.
Cover Any Essential Legal Fees
Throughout this process, you might be paying various legal fees. Trying to cover these fees can be challenging and stressful if you have minimal savings or you’re lacking consistent income. If you do not have the funds to cover these fees, we can help you reach out to local organisations that assist domestic abuse survivors and guide them to some financial stability.
Organise Legal and Financial Records
If you have accumulated a stack of legal and financial documents in the process of fleeing from your partner, including establishing custody rights for your children and pursuing a restraining order, it’s all too easy to lose paperwork in the moving process. If you have an opportunity to organize these documents while in a safe environment, it’s best to digitize them. After digitizing your documents, you can set up password protection or additional cybersecurity measures. This link gives more guidance on tech abuse Secure your tech - Refuge
Secure Safe Housing
When it comes to finding safe and affordable housing, you can ask for help from a reputable organisation that assist domestic abuse survivors in your area. You may be in a Refuge and although this accommodation may be temporary, simply having a safe place to rest your head for a while can give you the opportunity to rebuild your life. HDAH work closely with all Hertfordshire refuge providers and they offer in house support as well as outreach support to help you emotionally and financially.
Leaving an abusive relationship can be extremely difficult. The current housing and financial crisis has created even more obstacles for domestic abuse survivors. With these guidelines, you’ll be able to organize and protect key documents, cover any remaining legal fees, and find housing that suits your budget.
Have you been affected by domestic abuse? You can seek free, confidential support by calling HDAH today at 08 088 088 088 or email kim@mailpurple.org.
Post written by Sharon Wagner